Eat or be eaten!

So I've had the idea to write this post for a long time, because there is a lot to say about this topic. All I needed was a little push (from my sister) and some motivation (from my Redskins). So in preparation, I tried to recreate an authentic, American sports-viewing environment by buying 2 Heineken canned beers, 1 bag of steak flavored potato chips (picked over Italian red beef flavor), and 1 peanut butter sandwich. I've prepared for this for 2 weeks, but two weeks ago by the time I was tuned into the Redskins game we were already down 14-0, 7 minutes into the game (can't write an anger-fueled post), and last week the internet went out hours before the game started. I went to my girlfriends room to make use of her internet, and keep her up from 2-5:30am, but she had not paid her electrical bill, so around 11pm we found ourselves sitting in darkness. Apparently in China, in the dorms, you have to pay for electricity..So, obviously, I've been looking forward to this.

Because it's the most recent memory, I'll start with my walk by the 'local/community rec center area' located on campus this evening. I was walking after dinner when I began to hear music blaring from around a corner. I went to investigate and discovered what I guess I would call jazzercise? Basically it was an open courtyard area, with about 12 people randomly dotting the area, listening to Penguin's Game by Gelato, while jumping up and down. No other movements, literally just hopping straight up and down, offbeat like some sort of bobblehead or pogo stick. Meanwhile, lining the courtyard are public, playground-like exercise/weight machines being used by 65+ year old Chinese. Inside the center, you could see through the windows, were about 3 ping-pong tables, all being furiously occupied in intense table tennis competitions. I think it's pertinent to mention hear that I have also witnessed wrinkly, ageless men nearly shirtless (tanktops) playing away at 8:30am..in 2 degree weather (Celsius, I'm overseas everyone!). Needless to say, they are very serious about sport and exercise here.

To portray just how vital exercising is here in China, let me describe the scene in the gym. If you decide to go just as the gym opens, you will have to take a number, as there is a line waiting for the doors to open. Once they do, it's a race to get to the machine first. Of course, finders keepers losers weepers. Reach your machine, claim it with a cellphone or some other personal object, then go and take your time changing in the locker room. IF you even decide to change. Some Chinese are so hardcore and enthusiastic about exercising that they don't even change clothes! Can you imagine being so excited to exercise that you just wear jeans, sweaters, or even high heels to work out? Me neither, but apparently the Chinese can! (I'm serious about the high heels too). Also you should see these people push it to the limit. Imagine a treadmill on 10 incline, with a girl working so hard to walk uphill that she is grasping both handles just to stay alive. Others are more casual, 'running' at a mean 4km/hour. Let me convert for you; 'running' at a mean 2.6mph. Just taking up space, making everyone else wait for the machines. My girlfriend has waited 40 minutes for a machine before (yes that's devotion, and it's great she takes care of her body every woman should). Also, this is just 40 minutes of waiting..it's 40 minutes of alert, on your toes scanning/listening for any sign or beep that might indicate someone will finish using the machine, lest someone else who may have just arrived hop on immediately. Try arguing to someone who A) will not understand your point of view and B) does not even speak your language. 

One striking similarity between Chinese gyms and American is the social aspect. Without question its a place to make friends! I mean with everyone looking so hot and fly, showing off their bods how could you resist some conversation? I think thus far I've been asked for my number at least 3 or 4 times. Oh yeah, it might be important to mention that everytime it's been a guy trying to make friends..awesome. 

Anything goes in China. This is the country where when you go to challenge someone in pick up soccer, it's okay to then start naming your own rules. House rules don't apply! Rules don't even apply! Eat of be eaten! I wish so badly I would have gotten footage of my friend Ella's girls basketball games. Sometimes I wasn't sure if I was watching basketball or some cross between American football and handball. Girls were decking each other left and right, hair was flying, the feet were moving, the ball wasn't touching the ground, and games ended with scores like 26-0. Absolute chaos. But it's just something I've got to expect from the country. It's a scary moment when you see things like this, or someone run their motorbike into the back of a parked car thats 5 meters from you, then go back to having your beer because you realize how insignificant and commonplace this stuff is. Whatever, it's China.

Celebrity Special Edition - White Beard, Red China

Without further delay, I am glad to introduce our first celebrity guest to Blonde Hair, Red China! A recent guest of mine, I have ask them to share their thoughts on this Communist country. He's saved lives, he's raised 4 kids, and he hasn't shaved his beard in 40 years..I bring you the eloquent thoughts of Mr. John B. Muuuuuueeellller:


"What you say here is so true.  China feels different. looks different and is different.  On arriving I was overwhelmed by the sense of disconnect I had with everyone around me.  I didn't know what all these people were thinking about when they got up in the morning and I had trouble attributing my set of values/motivations into there heads.   Maybe it was jet lag, but I was intrigued about what appeared to be a billion smiling faces,  Shop keepers, streetside vendors, the young men and women dressed in their white shirts and black suits on there way to work, they all appeared to be smiling and I didn't get it.  Did it come from the Buddah that sits in the temple up on the hill built by thousands of laborer that dumped the dirt by the bucketfull from the bottom of the lake they were building for the emperor.  I saw no reflection of religion on the streets that would suggest this.  Was it the sunshine that was present my week of visiting?  I had been told that Beijing could be cold and the sky grey.   Or was it simply that everyone knew that, as a whole, they are better off today then they were 15 years ago and the sense of national success just infuses the fabric of everyday life.   Is what I saw a bubble of prosperity waiting to burst.

The cynic in me would suggest that I was shown a false front.   After a few days in Beijing I considered the possibility that the Chinese government, as they prepared for the 2008 Olympics,  may have taken lessons from management down in Orlando  and I was still seeing the benefits of that effort.  The tourists spots are  painted, the gardens along the streets are planted, the weeds are gone, trash is out of sight  and the streets have been kept clean.  The only thing missing was Micky.  But as I said, that may be the cynic in me speaking.

The Chinese appear to have succeeding in learning the lessons of marketing 101.   Let me digress a moment and reflect on learning to ski.  Years ago, we took the kids to colorado to ski.  The mountain where we went had  a ski lift and you had to walk about 300 yards from the parking lot to the base of the lift before you could start your day.  Along the path there was a wooden structure "the ski school" , a place to rent skis and a small cafeteria.  That is all you needed because we were there to go skiing.   The walk was long but it was pretty and thru some woods and over a creek and it was about the outdoors.

Now, when we go back,  the walk is lined with condominiums, high end sporting good stores, small cafes and coffee shops as well as western themed artists gallery's and boutique clothing stores.  At the end of the walk you get to the same ski lift and mountain, but the experience is different.

What does this have to do with China you might ask.  Well China like the ski resort has placed the commercial activities front and center.  When we went to the great wall to hike along the mountainous ridges, be found the same things we found outside our mountain back home.  At the base of the mountain, there was a recently built paved road, lined with recently built cafes and shops selling art, and food and the exact same China memorabilia we found in Xi'an or the forbidden city.  The great wall hasn't changed in the last 30 years, but the experience has.  Buying a Teeshirt that declares "I hiked the great wall"  no longer seemed appealing, the adventure is gone.  Beijing was very similar.  We walked thru Tiananmen square past Mao's mausoleum and the great hall of the people to a market.  Beijing is known for these markets and we were going to one of the oldest commercial markets in the city, Qianmen Dajie.   This ancient street is lined by  quaint "hutangs", small alleys along the outside the neighborhoods of walled-off courtyards and homes or along the outside walls of ancient monasteries and parks and temples.  The alleys are a hotbed of commerce that  sell everything you need.  Shoes, dumplings, food on a stick, shirts and scarves, hats and gloves.  

As we walked along the dajie we stopped at a a small restaurant and looked at the shops that lined the street as we approached the hutang.  As I sat there I looked at the stores,  there was H&M, Nike Express, Rolex and other names I recognized all in English lettering above the Chinese Characters.  And I even found Micky, not the Orlando Micky with the big ears, but MickyD selling his big macs to the world.  I finished my drink and Celeste captured the moment, a weary traveling seeking comfort in an exotic locale.

 I started out suggesting that I didn't know what was going on inside the minds of everyone I saw, but once I arrived home and the fog of travel lifted, I had a better perspective on what I was experiencing.  The discordance I felt was mine.  Meeting my friends and coworkers I realized that I knew what was on the minds of those billion smiling faces, it was the same thing that was behind the faces here at home.  Experiencing China was like taking a Rorschach test.  What you see or don't see says more about the observer then what is being observed.   It is both a window to the world outside as well as an entry to the world within.  Most of all it is a window worth looking thru."

onlystupidpeoplesaywhat? pt. 1

In Beijing, destinations are often quite far away (upwards of 10km), and sometimes it seems that there is no real 'map' of the city. Even cab drivers don't always know where certain streets are, so it is best to know exactly where you are going. You can learn how pack yourself into a subway and feel the strange sensation of being one small part of a mass of people that is also riding the train or resign yourself to a taxi and possibly subject yourself to one of Beijing's five-beltway like roads. These 'ring roads' almost exactly mirror the Capital Beltway at 7am or 6pm any day of the week..3pm works also..and so does 10pm on some Sunday evenings. Nevertheless, taxi is a quite common form of transportation, and acquiring one can often be quite a struggle in a city of 17.5 million people. When it's rainy, stay inside or you will wait for hours. When it's cold, stay inside or you might wait for hours. Most surprisingly, besides rain, the worst time might be the time when taxis are needed the most. When people get off work, don't even try to flag on. Strangely enough, taxi drivers get off at the same time as the rest of Beijing. So as you are preparing yourself to get home, your driver is also. Thus when taxis are most needed, we find the largest shortage.

An incident like this makes you wonder, 'What idiot thought of that policy?' What nincompoop called for a supply shock simultaneous to an increase in demand? It's terrible, but 'Whatever, it's China!' There are enough of these bizarre, head-scratching incidents that as a Westerner/Ex-pat/Foreigner you can share an entire meal discussing how they would be simply solved. Alas, things are different this side of Constantinople. So for this blog post I thought it would be appropriate to share some of these quagmires:

1) A touch back to a previous post. In the US, and many other countries around the world. We understand that on an escalator you stand on the right and walk of the left. Simple enough, we all get where we are going. That doesn't apply here. In fact, the simple norm of walking on the right side of anything road/path/lane does not exist. It is a free for all. Whatever direction you go you are (see last post) a salmon walking upstream. There is no escape. Their minds are geared to get directly from point A to point B. Straight to it. Which brings me to point 2.

2) Gridlock is normal. It's widely accepted. Everyone wants to get theirs, and like the metro, or a bus coming down from the rice terraces, there is always room to squeeze one more person on or car through an intersection. Even when it's not possible. I imagine the opening scene in office space where Peter, in his car, helplessly watches a man using a walker race by him while he sits in a traffic jam on the way to work. Instead of becoming creative, and maybe take a backstreet (which aren't exactly small alleyways), they must take the big street! Point A to point B! Straight line! No creativity!

3) Jam packed on the subway the other day, I was so happy to arrive at a transfer point. About 3/4 of all the people in my car got off. The car next to me unloaded only about 1/3 of their people. These cars are all open and are not separated. So while I was enjoying my newfound free space, I was staring into the car next to me, wondering why the sardines had not started migrating into open space. This is one of the rare times when I was happy the Chinese can sometime appear to be 'a little slow'. Not all of it can be blamed on cultural differences.

4) Some things just make no sense at all. Example no. 1 - I had some delicious Beijing Duck for lunch today. My friend had a coupon, given to him by the restaurant, and was told to present it next time. We get the bill and tell them not to forget about the coupon we presented. Oh wait, problem! After hearing some incomprehensible Chinese, I understand 'use it next time you come'. My friend Sami has a simple solution to this problem. He looks at the waiter very solemnly and says 很好 which is the equivalent of saying 'its good' and 现在, meaning now. Usually effective, the waiter was unphased and sent another worker to deal with us. Apparently the problem is that the coupon was for a duck that was more expensive than the one we ordered....so the problem is that we are not saving enough money? I don't get it, we are full, they profit, all's well.

5) Babies piss and shit everywhere. Literally everywhere: shopping streets, on my campus, at bus stops outside the restaurants. It's all fair game. They even have babies wear pants with no butt so they can poop immediately. Or not even wear pants at all! It's just easier that way.

6) This issue is currently the most pertinent on everyone's minds. And it will be for the next 2 weeks. So in Beijing right now, the temperature is at a mild 0 degrees Celsius (32 Fahrenheit). It started dropping in early October and has not gone up since. I fear January and February...or do I. At least by that point, the government will allow the heat to be turned on. I kid you not, we do not have heat. It's not even funny enough to add a ! I'm so totally serious. It has been 4, 5, and 0 degrees the past 3 days, and we haven't had head. We haven't had heat since last winter, in fact. I'm in my room right now wearing jeans, socks, shoes, t-shirt, sweater, sweatshirt, jacket, and 2 hats and I'm freezing. My hands are the only thing uncovered because I can't type in while wearing mittens! And it even hurts to bend my knuckles. Sometimes I think it's warmer outside than it is in my room. I fear getting out of bed. This is a serious problem. The heat doesn't come on until Nov. 15. that's over two more weeks of possibly freezing temperatures....literally freezing! 0 C = 32 F = Freezing! I've never been more happy to drink hot tea with every meal.

I will leave you with several photos as usual. One is using thermal imaging, and just remember that red, or green means heat, other colors do not.

Bleu Marine - probably the best steak in town - I believe it considering I first saw this sign 8 years ago and it's still around

I wasn't joking.

 Only in China.

 Thermal imaging, blue = cold.

What I wore while writing this blog entry.

Miss all of you and central heating even more. Our class discussion today went over what heating techniques we used in our home countries. Central heating, fireplaces, it was alll so cruel. Until next time!

National Inefficiency Holiday

Afternoon, many of you are sleeping right now, it is 3:30 am EST, meanwhile I am passing the time until I have dinner tonight with both of my parents and Susan/Sabrina Orlins. I would like to first apologize for the interminable delay between posts, I hope I have not lost many readers. It has been, for the past 2 weeks, a vacation of many sorts. For the period from Sept. 30 - Oct. 10 there was a holiday to celebrate the founding of the PRC on Oct. 1, 1949. I would like to note an interesting fact about Chinese holidays. There are times when you are given extra days off, say the Thursday before a Friday to extend the holiday, but in exchange you are forced to work that Sunday. Bizarre, I know. Us students are also subjected to this backwards logic and in vain tried to argue our case. Nonetheless, 'This is how we do it in our country'.

Otherwise, the vacation was quite nice. Sabrina Orlins and I made our way by of a 24-hour sleeper train to Guilin, Guangxi Province, China. The original plan was to train down Thursday night, stay in Guilin until Sunday at which point we would take a boat down the Li River to Yangshuo, Guangxi Province and enjoy ourselves until Wednesday when we would return to Guilin and catch a Wednesday evening train home. I emphasize, 'the original plan'. I later found out that at this time last year an estimated 57 million people travelled within China.

The day I went to buy the train tickets at the station, I was curtly informed that you cannot purchase train tickets until 11 days in advance. I patiently waited and at the appropriate time followed up. What I did not realize was that all of China was going to take a train this holiday. I waited in line for 30 minutes only to be told they had no tickets left. The next day I went back and found out that, in fact, there were Friday morning tickets available, but no sleepers. That same day, Sabrina asked near her apartment and purchased 2 sleeper tickets for Friday night. Makes no sense, I know. Friday we train down to Guilin, and when we get off, we immediately go to buy return tickets. Unfortunately Oct. 5, 6, 7 were all sold out of tickets completely. We tried to get a ticket agency to help us, but they replied it was too crazy during the holiday. Dejected, we decided to check into our hostel. We arrive to the news that they have overbooked and we have lost a room, regardless of the fact that I have already paid a deposit on my credit card..what can they do? kick out other guests who reserved rooms? Exasperated, we agree to let them room us at some other hostel owned by the same guy. Large room, mattress like a board, but good location. We book a trip to the LongJi Rice Terraces the next day (Dragon's Backbone, very famous) for 8 am. Our bus arrives at 845. We arrive at the terraces at 11, wait until 1215 to take one of their buses up the mountain. The bus takes....2 1/2 hours to go up the side of this mountain. On the way down we find that normally it takes a mere 20 minutes to drive down. The problem was that on this skinny mountainside road, people began to park their cars and walk because the lot was full and it turned a 2-lane road into a 3-lane road by necessity. But the road was only 2 1/2 cars wide. Chaos ensued. We proceeded to walk the last 1km or so. Once there we lost our guide in the large crowd and eventually had to convince them to let us in without a ticket. We searched this mountainside/alpine town for our group while taking some great photos of beautiful scenery. Eventually we turned into a random restaurant and voila! there they were. Unfortunately in 20 minutes time we had to turn down to not miss the bus. So we kept hiking up, never made it to the very top, but found some easily appreciable views from the path. Once we reached the bottom, promptly at 430, we waited for our bus. Somehow we waited 45 minutes and got onto the last bus possible. We transformed a 15 passenger bus into a 43-passenger bus. I counted 3 times because I couldn't believe myself.

That night, we give in a extend our vacation 2 days. I'm now leaving on Friday night, Sabrina Friday morning by plane. We had no other option. I was forced to ride a 27-hour train, no sleeper, just a hard seat that didn't recline, surrounded by tens of students who had purchased standing room only. That is a story for another time.

Finally we get to take our much anticipated boat down the Li River to Yangshuo. What could be more picturesque than rafting down a river surrounded by majestic limestone peaks? How about rafting down the river with maybe 100 other boats in sight at all times? If you guessed so you're absolutely right. It was packed, and in these 4 person boats, the slightest wave caused a spray to splash all over the deck. It looked like I pissed myself by the end. I was not happy. The bus from Xingping to Yangshuo was much nicer, it again was 43 people, but this time at least the bus was originally for 20 people, not 15..

Yangshuo was actually an amazing town, and things there were gorgeous. If anyone ever visits this side of the world, I recommend going. Its close to Thailand and Vietnam, so you can alwasy tack it on the side of your trip. However don't go during Chinese National Holiday. First of all, it was so packed that any direction you walk, it's like youre a salmon walking upstream. Fighting the current of Chinese people, you can easily see your destination over their mini-selves, but its so ahrd to reach it. They havne't evolved to the 'walk on the right side of the st' part yet. You walk straight, wherever you want to go, and stop wherever you want to stop. Maybe that is why the traffic in Asia is the way it is. Secondly, if you don't absolutely know where you are going, its a problem. People have never heard of certain street names besides the large ones (this applies to all over China), maps are not what they appear to be (this applies to all over China), they are not reliable with telling you the time or distance it takes to get somewhere (this is true all over China), and many of the phone numbers on websites are not up to date (this is common with all companies in China). In short, we couldn't find our hostel for maybe 45 minutes. Just holding our bags, walking upstream with a map out. God I hate having a map out. Although I did find a great cure for these horrible, pissy moods that China inefficiency Holiday put me into - Gin and Tonics.

All in all, Yangshuo and Guilin were a great trip. We rode our bikes into the countryside 20 km through rice paddies, sesame fields, cotton fields, etc., went rock climbing up some awesome crags, saw an agricultural wonder of the world, and met some cool people. But it is striking that I have, and have left out so much, detailed my trip through episodes of chaos and ineptitude. It makes sense seeing that China is a country of 1.3 billion people. But it is stark evidence of the lack of infrastructure that its evident in many places all over the country. One thing I did learn, however, is the ability to shrug it off and say 'Whatever, it's China'.

I leave you with some photos of my journey, not the best, but the ones I have on my computer for now:

rice terraces

mountainside village at the rice terraces

rafting on the li river

view from the roof of my hostel in yangshuo

lunch spot during the bike trip

water buffalo during bike trip

you tell me, does it look like an elephant?

Excuse me, I have a very, very important announcement

Hold on everybody, I forgot to share a very important detail about the friends I've made in China. In case you didn't notice, they are all westerners...right? WRONG! I made my first Chinese friend the other day! Yayayayay!! ^_^

His name is Troy. We met in the gynasium lifting weights. See this is how it all unfolded, I wanted to use the bench press, and he had been using it, but not for a while. After the appropriate time of non-use I went over and began unloading the pansy weights he had been lifting. Troy, being the great friend he is, runs over and begins to help me change the weights. Putting my 20kg plates on, he released what can only be termed as a Chinese/Asian sound of amazement - 'waaaaaaaah!'. If you've ever met a real asian, you know the noise. It is full of pure, genuine excitement. So he introduced himself, we chatted for a minute or two, pretty stiff, but I had to get back to my program, I could hear Coach Kenny in my ear.

Later he comes up to me again, iPod in hand, asking for my information. Because I'm such a nice guy and also a little naive at times, I gave it to him. He appears harmless. This time I find out he's a marathon runner. My response is that his legs look like twigs. 'Waaaaah!' he proclaims, 'You are so funny'. Anyways, he's finished, I'm getting back on the grind, and my friend Julia the German comes over to say hi because she's a fitty and habits the gym as well.

3rd time Troy comes over...he forgot his card! Oh my, he tries to start chatting again..Sank you! Monday I will see you! Sure, Troy. He shakes my hand for the third or fourth time and then heads off. The next day, Saturday morning at 7:45 am, I receive an e-mail which I would like to share:

Hi Zach：
 
How's going? enjoy everyday life in Beijing. I will tell you something fun about Chinese culture. and I am very happy to be your friend. see you on Monday around 5 in the afternoon in gym. 
BTW: My phone number is 13811182349 Keep in touch. Plus, your Chinese speaking is fabulous. Keep going!!! You will definitely speak like a native speaker.


best wish
Troy


What can I say...my first Chinese friend!!!

Vote for Zach, the next America's president!

How's it going folk? So I've now been in the BJ for about 2 1/2 weeks, and things are finally starting to settle down. Classes have begun, I'm learning the neighborhood, and since 3 straight blue skies I've seen nothing but grey. Like I said, things are starting to seem normal. Nevertheless, some things I'm continuing to feel out; for example, all the different people here in BJ. Thus far I've encountered a wiiide variety of characters, all bringing a little something different to the table. The point of this update is to provide a glimpse of some of the personalities that I get to enjoy while I'm here, either for the next 4 months or for the entirety of my adventure. So let us begin..

Ariadna/Hazel - She is a Columbian girl who is a foreign languages major or something like that. She has that typical Hispanic air to her, loves to dance, loves life, laughs a lot, and is about half my weight/height. Lots of fun though, someone who brings groups together.

Guisy/Cristiana - Two Italian girls from Naples who are roommates. They are like sisters but sometimes I think they are lala's (chinese for you know what, but they really aren't). Let me see, last night I went out with these two and have sharp, distinct memories of Guisy working the pole on the dance floor. Wait, maybe that was last weekend..Hold on, she did it both times! Cristiana is more laid back, she's got an LDR so she doesn't lead with the hips ;-)

Simon(e) - Frenchie. Uncool, trendy haircut, track pants, quiet. Like watching paint dry or grass grow. Take your pick. We've already resigned to the 'hello' and walk past.

Sergei - Think of the name Igor, Vladimir, Sergei, and they all direct you towards Eastern European muscle/thuggery. He's Moldavian with a thick accent to match. He orders Vodka straight, and kinda stands off on the side and observes a lot. Loves Chinese women though, haha.

Manuela/Julia - Another pair of possible lala's. German though, which is badass and naturally attractive to my blonde hair and blue eyes. But still, another LDR. I don't get it, everyone seems to think these things will last, I try to not be too cynical in front of them. These girls are great though, very much enjoy spending time with them. Can't say too much though because they're the only ones smart enough to find the address of this blog so far! (which is so sad because everyone kept asking and it was just on my facebook page until just now). Oh yeah, and Manuela is a Mueller..but she rocks and umlaut which is so legit.

Sho - Well we've talked about him before. You're standard Blue Bullet. Small, quiet, studious, but suprisingly understanding of Western culture. In fact, we were playing some tennis yesterday and I even heard him describe something with 'fucking'..His English is improving a lot thanks to me.

Amanda - I dont even know if this is her name, but the only reason she gets a shout out is because is the 1 other American I have met at Beiwai (my univeristy). Unfortunately she sucks. Nice girl, but just nice. No substance. Stanford to Boston Consulting Group to Beijing. Boring. Also she made 1 comment that killed any chance she had. At the end of a lunch with a random group of Germans and Koreans between classes, during a semi-awkward silence, she pulled the "well this was so much fun! we should come back to the same restaurant and do the same thing every week!" I could only cringe. Serious deus-chills. But come on, does that not scream 'I can't find friends I need to resort to you committing to have lunch with me once a week!'?

On a side note, I would like to say that I am repping America very well. Multiple times I have heard 'you're so american'. Maybe it's my america t-shirts, my usa socks, or the fact that I wear my flowered lax shorts with calf highs, who knows? But they love it and hate to admit it. Arrogant, vain, but mostly true. Giusy keeps repeating this quote in broken English that she made up that may shed some light, "I'm Zach, and I'll be the next America's president!!"

Natasa - 28 year old Serbian language teacher from Belgrade. Has that thick accent that Sergei has and provides an interesting perspective on China since she teaches the Chinese. If only she could communicate it. Slightly crazy, if you want to hear more on this topic, e-mail me.

Lukas/Mattias - 2 brothers from Argentina. Just getting to know them, but if you couldn't tell, I've got a dearth of candidates to do manly male bonding type things. Crazy guys, my age, I can tell we'll see more of each other. I just think there is this 'cultural barrier' type thing that stands between me and the koreans/japanese that rule the psychiatric ward that I live in.

Oskar/Karl - Sweedes. If you've ever met a Swedish person before, I need not say more.

So I'll leave it at that for now. Obviously some characters were not introduce or do not need introduction (see Sam Earl, Sabrina Orlins, Steve Robinson). All in all though, as I begin to filter people in and out and figure out who will last and who is gonna be voted off the island, I realize that I'm on my own for the next 10 months. There are good people here, but sadly, they are temporary as well. It gives an interesting twist to every encounter/interaction/moment that I have. Maybe it's because I know that 1) they don't compare to you all back home and 2) 10 months from now, poof!

Miss you all back home, it's great to hear from you when I do! Please continue humoring me with e-mails and skype chats (tz.mueller).

Vote for Zach, the next America's president!

Signing off,

ChangCheng

I think the most commonly used typical Chinese sounding word/sound is ChangCheng. Surprisingly enough, it is just about as true as you think it is. It turns out that ChangCheng is the Chinese word for the Great Wall of China. This past saturday I departed on a 9am fieldtrip to the great wall. Now I've been before, and the evening before was my first Friday night in Beijing, so I was just going to see where the night took me. Being only one of the vets on campus, many of the beijing n3wbs wanted me to show them around. I figured why not I'm going out anyways, lets take them to Sanlitun which is the neighborhood where all the bars are.

So we sit down andd star to have some beers at some random bar. Everyone is meeting everyone - Italians, Colombians, Russians, a Frenchie (who unsuprisingly is boring as all hell). Next thing we know some guy on a moped runs his vehicle into a parked car right behind us. It was ridiculous everyone on the st stopped and watched, the guy got up, and a minute later everyone was talking again. No one stopped to help or anything. That's sorta how it goes in BJ. Time for a change of scenery. I take the group to the different club called Red Bull. Everyone is dancing partying, the house music is flowing, and all of the sudden I see this dance circle forming..Next thing I know I'm watching an black guys breakdancing and, best of all, chinese dudes working a pole. It was hilarious. I guess thats what Chinese guys do in their spare time..practice pole dancing. We leave the club eventually and run into some argentinian guys from our university. We've all heard about this club "chocolate" apparently some Russian style bar. Not really sure what that means, so we go check it out. We get their and go down the escalator into this flourescent lighted bar, and the first thing I see is this midget asian. He has the sides of his head shaved and is sporting a pony tail. The concierge, apparently. I chatted with him for a little my goal is to get of pic with this dude. But anyways, this place chocolate ends up being a hell of a swanky bar. Girls in bikini tops dancing on the bar, on stage, on the dance floor. The perfect gentlemens club. Cheap prices, beautiful women. Needless to stay I was out all night.

So the next morning came time to go to the Great Wall. I fought with myself since I had been there before, whether or not to summon the energy to go. Thank god I did. Honestly I believe it is the coolest place I've been to in the world. Let me know show you some awesomeness:

First of all, it was the only day since I've been here that I saw the sunlight. The sky is always this pale shade of grey like someones holding an off color sheet over the sky. But also, check out the mountain range. This wall doesn't go on for 3,900 miles across the Michigan, Illinois, and the Great Plains, but over jagged mountain tops. Tower to tower is not a walk but a hike. They say 1 million people died during construction of the wall. If you think about it, I bet 500,000 americans would help to build a wall between the 1,900 mile US-Mexico border to stop illegals even if it might cost them their lives. 

The Great Wall is also a sweet place because of the random people you meet. Let me introduce you to the typical 'old' Chinese couple:

Man, thats exactly what you would expect, isn't it? One of the more peculiar things about the Great Wall was that the first restaurant you see when you arrive at this particular spot is Subway. Next to Arabic Roasters organic coffee. Didn't see that one coming...but hey, the Chinese did invent the sweet onion chicken teriyaki sub, didn't they?

Classes started today, but this post is getting too long at this point. I'll leave you with two last photos of my Blue Bullet roommate, Sho.

By the way, he's passed out with his head on his desk right now. In the background an anime moving is playing on his computer.

Sayanora!

Getting your feet wet.

   Every time you are about to do something, you generally like to start slowly. LIke getting into a pool. First you put your toes in to see how it goes then you jump in. In my regard, I dove headfirst. Cannonball. Boom. Welcome to China!
    I think it all really hit me when I walked out of the international flights area at Beijing Capital to that area where everyone waits for people to arrive and hold signs with names on them. It was like red carpet treatment. Everyone (important to note all asian) is starting at you..are you John Steckleburg, Joan Matheson, John Doe?
    I managed a cab to my campus, followed some poorly translated signs, registered for my room and finallyr eached the door...to my prison cell:

    I kid you not. There might as well have been steel bars on the windows. I may appreciate it later in the semester when they would have prevented me from jumping out of my 3rd story window. You can vaguely see my new roommate, Sho something, the closest thing to a BLue Bullet. He hails from Kobe, Japan and is a nice guy, speaks decent English (thank god), but snores like I've never heard. Josh Tom gets put to shame. Hence, why I might jump out the window in the future.
    So when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade..right? WRONG! If you want orange juice go make some damn oranges. After waiting through 4 hours of lines to register, pay for housing, pay for insurance, pay for tuition, none of which I actually had to do because of my scholarship I went to the International Expert Office, aka the office where housing is taken care of (makes no sense to me either). Registration I might add is quite accurately described as a clusterfuck. Imagine 200+ people in a small room going through 7 tables that are not organized numerical but instead like a 7 point star so only lord knows what the hell is going on.
    I'm at the housing registration office and the woman is telling me there are no rooms available to switch to. I patiently give her my information, get put on a list, and will be given a phone call when a room opens. F* that. I need to take action. Next day, today, I come up with my plan. I find out you could have registered ahead online to book a room. I use this information to pretend I am being looked over, I registered during the summer, and I want my room. Damn, stubborn Chinese. She doesn't budge. I'm getting desperate. This is heightened by a quick memory/vision of the public bathroom down the hall with squatting not sit down toilets. I used to live in a castle for college, literally. This won't do. I pull out the big guns. How much money does she want? Amazingly she refuses. I tell her all the Chinese government officials are doing it to. She doens't budge. Is the US getting propaganda or soemthing? I thought everyone here was susceptible to bribes..I leave dejected, to my closet, where I am writing from now. My only answer is tomorrow I offer more money and to take her on a date, perhaps be her American boyfriend. It's all I have left. I can't prairie dog much longer.

Until next time..

Hi, Just trying this out. Always thought blogging was a bit for the dorks and nerds of the world. But as Lewis Skolnick taught the world, sometimes you can still get the girl.

So over the course of my 10-month adventure in a foreign land. Please feel free to follow along, comment, and enjoy my experiences. To set the record straight, I will be a Zeidman Fellow (through Sidwell Friends) and required to study mandarin Chinese at Beijing Foreign Studies University. Geographically I would designate Beijing as the Boston of China...shit. Sounds awful. But instead of Matt Damon and a whole lot of Irish Catholics, I'll be friends with Jackie Chan and the girl from the 2008 olympics who had a great voice but not good looking enough to be put on TV..

Should be interesting....let's see what happens! A good friend of mine, who I've learned a lot from, taught me a valuable life lesson which I will carry with me for a long time.

Good people + Good vibes = Good times

Simple math. Next step, let's find some good people.